Thanks for saving my Ass Again Hand & Body Lotion
$18.99
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For the GC who's fixed more packets than policy.
Designed for the hands that process enlistments, sign off waivers, and send that “you forgot section C” text with grace, this bottle says thank you and keeps the skin hydrated through every paper-cut contract cycle.
Why It Works:
-9.8oz pump bottle — easy desk flex, real-world useful
-99% natural origin — unlike some of the excuses in your packet
-Infused with essential oils — zesty, fresh, and professionally unbothered
-Vegan + ECOCERT certified — clean inside and out
-Soaks in fast — no greasy hands, just ready-for-more-contracts skin
It’s not just for dry hands.
It’s for the ones who keep this mission from falling apart.
Thanks for saving my Ass Again Hand & Body Lotion
$18.99
Designed for the hands that process enlistments, sign off waivers, and send that “you forgot section C” text with grace, this bottle says thank you and keeps the skin hydrated through every paper-cut contract cycle.
Why It Works:
-9.8oz pump bottle — easy desk flex, real-world useful
-99% natural origin — unlike some of the excuses in your packet
-Infused with essential oils — zesty, fresh, and professionally unbothered
-Vegan + ECOCERT certified — clean inside and out
-Soaks in fast — no greasy hands, just ready-for-more-contracts skin
It’s not just for dry hands.
It’s for the ones who keep this mission from falling apart.
